A New Frame
At times when I am having a conversation with people who are interested in knowing how I work with people, ask me this. What do you mean by identifying and working on areas of growth? Let us recall, Growing up, in school, you are great at science, but in illustrating and naming diagrams you struggle. You are always well prepared for exams and have a super memory, but on the day of the exam, you feel so nervous that you are unable to complete writing your paper. Similarly, you love hanging out with certain friends but hesitate to, join them because you feel you are perceived as not cool enough. You are part of a school project, and have lots of ideas, but are perennially frustrated with the group as you feel they are not as sincere about the project as you want them to be. These and many more…
Being Myself
What do you mean by being myself, how do I know I am being myself? Asked one little friend of mine who was told at school by their teacher to be themselves. I felt this was a very good question by the child. How do we know? What exactly are we looking for? And as I am writing I realise this monologue could go in any direction, so let me take it in the direction of what my friend was asking. How do I know I am being myself? To know that maybe we first need to first ask, How do I know am not being myself? Let’s take a small chunk, how do I know am not feeling angry? And one may say, my body feels at ease and it feels relaxed, and light, and I am speaking at a normal pace and am able to listen, focus, etc… …
GIVE IT ALL
What if I fail? My client said this the other day as he shared his fears. And after our session, it got me thinking. With almost all the people I have been working with, addressing the fear of failure seems to be a common factor that we work through, and it does not seem surprising at all as it’s a very natural emotion we all easily experience. If we looked at the feelings of fear as a feeling that comes and goes like sadness or anger or irritation then maybe it does not seem so limiting. It certainly is useful when it stops us from doing something foolish like petting a lion in a zoo. But what if that fear stops us from attempting something or even learning what we want to and holds us back from progressing? Like you want to be a sales rockstar but you don’t want…
Power up
One of the intentions, when I started writing my blog, was to share few insights so that if someone is going through something similar, it might help them get some clarity or even a perspective. Today I wish to share how I discovered ways to stay committed to any action I decide. I am not feeling motivated! For the longest time I remember, I struggled in a few areas of my life and kept searching for a motivation pill. Be it studies, exercise or even getting into a routine. I was not taking a single step after taking a decision. Secondly, even if I did begin, I was not consistent. I was not keeping the word I gave myself. I used to take a few actions and then after a day or two fall off the radar. What do I mean by that? You decide to exercise every day but…
Present Miss!
I am not sure how they do it in school now but I remember responding to my Roll call with a loud enthusiastic“Present Miss!” In fact, I remember each one of my friends had a unique way to respond. We marked our attendance with that shout, but is the physical presence equivalent to being really present? I have a cook who comes to the house. She is one bright spirited lady who makes tasty food in a jiffy. Her cleanliness and neatness while prepping up is something to learn. It’s been more than fifteen years since she has chosen cooking as her profession and is quite proud that she has not had a single major complaint until now. I asked her how she manages to remember the exact taste preferences of so many houses (Seven exactly). She replied in Kannada, “When I step into a house, I leave all my…
Get your play glasses on!
Did you have fun today? If anyone had asked me this question a few years back, I would have thought of them as trivial. While I was finding my feet in the coaching business and sharpening my ability as a coach, my teacher used to end our session saying, “Play with it …have fun.” My mind used dismiss those words immediately. How can I have fun when I am building a business, a career, working with people and achieving results? I need to work hard and harder and then a bit more to reach my goal, isn’t it? Fun and play was a sin in my world when it came to working or taking care of responsibilities. I trust most of you look at it differently. But sometimes I meet clients who share the same frequency like I used to have and for them and all of you who equalize…
Learners Mindset
I was bitten by the learner’s bug in my college days. I loved reading books related to my course, taking notes sitting on the first bench, making my own observations and studying. After college hours, I made sure I was always learning something. So I enrolled in a Chinese cookery class, a typing class, computer class, stitching lessons and many others. Today, when I sit back and connect the dots, it looks like me getting into the facilitation and coaching realm was a very obvious sequel to my career than by chance. In the years when I was heading a system integrating business for a few years, I remember feeling stagnated as I was not actively learning. I was someone who believed that learning comes only from doing and studying. And once we learn, we automatically mature and expand in intelligence. That was my understanding till my teacher/mentor helped me…
Shed the layers
Today I would like to begin by sharing the gist of three movies that I feel gave a compelling universal message. Hope you have seen few of them. A few years back I watched the movie “Up” that I love repeatedly watching even today. In the film, Carl Fredrickson’s heart is hardened by his wife’s death. He buries his loving self and spirit of adventure along with her. But there is a moment in the movie where he is flipping through his childhood –adulthood photo album. As he looks into the pictures that reflect his genuine self, in an instant he realizes what is missing within him, and sheds his defences. He reconnects with the innocent, full of wonder adventurer who he is quintessentially and that brings him back to life! In the movie Tamasha, the main protagonist is almost executing his life by concealing his true spirit. He is…
Let us Re-Invent!
“As we move ahead in life, based on the natural laws that govern human growth and progress, enriched with experiences, and changing circumstances, our roles and goals keep on changing and to keep up with the momentum we need to keep on reinventing ourselves. Of course, we need to always be who we are but there can always be a better you” These are a few lines that I had penned five years back when I became a Facilitator. I had to decide a name for my company and the word “Reinvent” kept coming back, but I thought it sounded like a formula and decided to reinvent it further and called my company “Reivent”. I realise now, that the fascination with this term was coming more out of my experience, as with the new venture of mine I was reinventing myself. Little did I know that this small written piece…
That’s just Mumbo Jumbo
Sunday morning is a morning I wait for, as every sunday my family and I head out for some yummy masala dose and filter coffee followed by a round of vegetables & grocery shopping. One Sunday as we sat down at our regular restaurant, I noticed a large happy family sitting at a table parallel to ours. The distance between the tables was hardly two feet, something very commonly seen in a typical darshini (restaurant) in Bangalore. These were a group of happy-looking kids, mostly young adults. They looked like a family of cousins who had gathered for a breakfast brunch. Orders were flying from their table while they were relishing piping hot south Indian breakfast. I had a feeling of warmth in my heart as I watched them, remembering my crazy picnics and outings with my cousins. Our order reached the table, and we dived into the much-celebrated crispy…